By Kami's Grace
by Devon Aster
Summary: Set in Mirai Trunks' timeline. Takes a look at what a refugee might experience. Bonus Poem Dead Blue Sea. Constructive criticism always welcome. PG13 for violencedeath
1. The Worth of One

_**Author's Notes:** An experimental little fic, set in Mirai Trunk's timeline. Focuses on what a 'normal' human might experience. Constructive criticism always welcome.__**  
Disclaimer:** Don't own DBZ, certainly not making any money off this. Hasu is mine, so is Nobara and Tsubomi _ ^_^

**By Kami's Grace**

**Chapter 1**

Hasu gathered the tatters of her once white robe around her, a futile attempt to keep out the unseasonable chill. The sleeves fluttered a bit and stirred the air. Hasu scowled as the sour odor of her own body reached her. 'Ugh...I need a bath' she thought, disgusted. She rubbed her grubby hands together, as if she could clean them with the action alone, and her scowl deepened. She hated being this dirty.

'Hard to keep very clean these days' she admitted to herself. She scanned the area around her, taking in the crumbling walls and patched holes in the ceiling. It was an old school building, one of the few structures still standing after the attack that had changed this world. It had originally been chosen as a refugee shelter because water still came through the pipes. But a few weeks ago, the water had stopped.

Most people blamed the androids, the ones responsible for the destruction of the city in the first place. Many believed it was an attempt to force them out. Hasu doubted the androids had done it deliberately. Rather, she believed it was an indirect result of some other attack. 'But why do they attack us at all?' she wondered. It seemed to be a mystery to everyone.

"ahhh...aahma?" a soft little voice seemed to query her. Hasu blinked, distracted from her musings, then cast her gaze down to the infant lying in her lap. The baby's round face scrunched in uncertainty. Tears pooled in his green eyes.

The scowl melted from Hasu's face and she smiled reassuringly. She stroked the small head, soothing away the infant's fretting expression.

"Hush, Tsubomi," she whispered. She picked up the baby and cradled it in her arms. A thrill of quiet pleasure went through her. Hasu sighed. She always felt happiest when holding a baby. 'It's like...touching the purest essence of life' she thought with wonder. She smiled down at Tsubomi. The infant cooed, then made a few whimpering noises when Hasu didn't move.

"Ah, You want your mama, don't you?" Hasu said to the baby, her smile turning wistful. "Well, the doctor should be done with her now, so why don't we go see her?" She rose carefully from the mat she had been sitting on. Heading out into a hallway, she walked over to the gym area, where the main infirmary had been set up. She didn't walk as quickly as was usual, because a selfish part of her didn't want to give Tsubomi up too soon.

It wasn't long, though, before she was at the mother's bedside. The fair haired woman opened weary eyes. Her face practically shone when she saw Tsubomi. She held out her arms for her son.

"Here's your mama," Hasu said as she handed the infant over. The woman murmured a silent 'thank you' as she hugged Tsubomi close. Hasu bowed slightly, then quickly turned and left. She didn't want Tsubomi's mother to see her envy. Taking a deep breath, she pushed away her feelings, she knew there was no place for such selfishness now.

Hasu wandered through the rest of the shelter, peeking in here and there, checking to see if the doctors or nurses needed supplies, or if the refugees wanted anything. She had to reassure several that the evening water ration would come soon. It was her job to see to these little things, to fetch what was needed or pass messages along, and generally help out where she could. What small skills she had, she was happy to give.

Eventually, Hasu arrived at the cooking area. Steam drifted out the doorway, along with a good amount of wood smoke. She waved aside the offending fumes and stepped inside. The room was empty, not unusual considering the air made it difficult to breathe easily. Hasu went to the stove and pushed the small pipe flue open a little wider. The mechanism didn't work very well, opening only a bit, but it gave some relief. She then checked the noodles, which were boiling in a broth. The scowl from before returned.

'Noodles in broth...Nobara would cringe,' thought Hasu. It wasn't the dish itself that was the problem, it was the way they had to cook it. 'The noodles should be cooking in water, not the broth itself' she thought peevishly 'Doing it this way always makes the soup too thick and cloudy.' Hasu gave a short, humorless laugh. 'Listen to me, all I can do is complain, when I know water is a luxury.' She stirred the noodles a little, then left the cooking area.

Her duties seen to, Hasu slipped outside. She sighed as a cool breeze caressed her, thankful for the chill now after being in the kitchen. She surveyed the ruined world that surrounded her. Mighty skyscrapers that had once inspired awe lay in huge rubble heaps. The lights that had twinkled like stars fallen to earth at this time of night were extinguished. No cars zoomed by on the streets or people walking home, saying quick 'hellos' to others. It was dark and silent. It made Hasu shiver as her mind drifted back to the past.

Some years ago, two androids, inhuman monsters, came from nowhere and began destroying the Earth. She had been blessed, or cursed depending on the viewpoint, to have escaped the attack that originally leveled this city. She had been studying in a local university when all hell had broken loose.

Hasu remembered how frightened she had been when she heard the explosion. She had been alone in one of the classrooms, finishing an assignment, when it happened. She hadn't had time to react, though, as the walls imploded and she was thrown across the room. She had awoken some time later and managed to dig out of the debris. The hours after that were a bit unclear.

Confused and injured, she'd wandered into a shrine that had taken only a small amount of damage. A Buddhist nun, Nobara, had found her and bullied her back to health. The old, wiry woman refused to let her give up. "You die and you will have to start all over again" she would admonish. Hasu had tried to repay the woman by becoming a nun herself and helping with the refugees.

She was a bad nun, and she knew it. Buddha required that she give up all attachment to this world, to rid herself of feeling pain or pleasure. But she couldn't. How could she look upon the dead and wounded without feeling sorrow, or cry at night when her days were filled with the sounds of others' suffering? How could she not empathize with those who had lost family and friends?

After Nobara's death, Hasu had put away her black Buddhist robes and instead donned the white of Shinto. It had felt like a betrayal of her old friend, but it had been a worse betrayal, one against herself, to try and continue to be something she wasn't.

Hasu sighed and shook off the memories. She ran a hand through her short and shaggy brown hair, the last reminder of her time as a nun. The present mattered now, and what she could do to aid the future. Tomorrow she was going to search for water.

She knew what she was planning was dangerous. She had no skills in scouting, she could get herself seriously lost. She also had no fighting skills, though it was her own self that kept her from learning any. But she felt her present contributions to her world were negligible at best. There were only a few left in the infirmary now, like Tsubomi and his mother. And she knew her nursing skills were mostly ones of comfort, though some swore her very touch made them feel better. She shrugged such comments off as results of gratitude and kindness. Everything else she did could easily be done by anyone.

But to help find water...that would be something. She was one of the few who knew just how little fresh water was left. Since she worked in almost every part of the shelter, it hadn't taken long to gain that knowledge. The head organizer had made her swear she wouldn't tell any other refugees. They couldn't afford a panic or riot. She had agreed. Still, it was difficult to see the supply dwindle and to hear constant pleas for more.

"I have to do this," she hissed. "I want to make a difference!" The thought filled her with determination.


	2. The Price of Salvation

_**Author's Notes:** An experimental little fic, set in Mirai Trunk's timeline. Focuses on what a 'normal' human might experience. Constructive criticism always welcome.__**  
Disclaimer:** Don't own DBZ, certainly not making any money off this. Hasu is mine, so is Nobara and Tsubomi _ ^_^

**By Kami's Grace**

**Chapter 2**

The next day, Hasu slipped out of the old school building. It was early morning, the sky just turning from gray to a warm pinkish hue in the east. Hasu took a second to admire the beauty of the sunrise, then moved away quickly through the tangle of half-fallen buildings nearby.

Not long ago, when she was helping bring in an injured man, she had passed by a place that had caused her to feel something. She couldn't describe it, it was like some instinct was telling her that what they needed was there. She had tried to convey this to the scouting party later, but they said the area had been searched. Hasu wasn't usually one to pay attention to 'hunches', but this once she was willing to think maybe some spirit was guiding her. After all, if they didn't find a source of clean water soon, the refugees would begin to suffer.

With this in mind, Hasu headed toward the spot she had noticed. It took her an hour or so, but she managed to find it. The area was a patch of overgrown shrubs, stuck in the crevice of a tumbled down wall. Hasu forced her way through the branches. Droplets of blood fell on her robe as she broke the small limbs and they in turn scratched her skin. The few feet to the other side seemed to take forever to reach.

Finally, she broke through. Hasu found herself in a forgotten garden. A wild array of flowers spilled color everywhere. Oranges, yellows, blues and reds danced against a blanket of dark green. The air was heavy with the perfume of the blossoms. Hasu stood in awe, feeling almost overwhelmed at such natural beauty after seeing only decay for so long. Her eyes touched every inch of the garden. She looked up to where a mansion must have stood once, but now was long gone. Hasu's gaze eventually settled on a small shrine under a cherry tree and her ears picked up the faint rushing of water.

Hasu went to the shrine and knelt before it, offering a prayer of thanks. Then she quickly searched out the source of the rushing sound. She soon found a spring, with grasses overhanging its edges. A small taste of the water confirmed it was pure and most likely natural. With shaking hands, she pulled out a scrap of paper and the stub of a pencil. She made a map of the spring's exact location.

Hasu examined the map several times, making sure she hadn't confused her directions or left out any landmarks. She had to be certain the scouting party could find the garden easily. At last, satisfied she had done her best, she tucked the paper away and headed back to the bushes. A part of her pleaded to stay a little longer, just a little while. But she ignored it. There was no time to waste on such a whim. So she pushed on through the bushes. She checked to see if anyone was around before she completely stepped through. Seeing only empty walkway, Hasu left the garden behind.

Not five minutes later, a loud explosion rocked everything around her, causing her to fall against an abandoned storefront. Hasu's heart quickened pace as she tried to determine the direction of the blast. A dust cloud swept over her, obscuring her sight. She stumbled into an ally, trying to escape the chocking dust. She felt a sliver of relief as her frantic mind assured her the garden was in the opposite direction of the blast.

Hasu froze as the sound of running footsteps came towards her. She quelled the beginnings of panic by telling herself the androids didn't run...at least that was what she had heard. She peeked out of the ally and saw that it was an obviously frightened boy. Tears streaked his face, sobs mixed with his heavy breathing. Just as he passed, Hasu reached out and grabbed his arm. The now terrified boy struggled as she tried to get him into the safety of the shadows. The boy began to scream, so Hasu immediately clamped a hand over his mouth.

"Hush," she whispered to him. She peeked out again, this time to see if anyone was right behind him. The boy looked around at her. Seeing that she was a human, he relaxed and nodded his head. Hasu returned her attention to him and removed her hand. She asked, "What is it? Is it them?"

The boy nodded again, frightened tears running down his face. "They're...they're chasing me!" he said in a choked whisper.

Just then, a soft, cold voice said clearly, "Come out boy. Don't waste my time with your game of hide and seek. Wouldn't you rather be with your parents?"

Hasu listened as approaching footsteps came slowly toward the ally. She turned questioningly to the boy. He mouthed, "They killed my parents"

Hasu felt anger well up inside her. 'What sort of devil tortures a child?' She took the boy firmly by his shoulders and looked into his eyes. He was about to speak when she shook her head. She took out the small map she had drawn, with the location of the spring, and placed it in one of the boy's fisted hands. Then, she leaned down and whispered in his ear.

The boy looked at her in surprise. He frowned and Hasu knew he was about to protest, so she again placed a hand over his mouth. She gave him her best 'obey me' look and turned him to face into the darkness of the ally. She gave him a small push to get him started. The boy glanced back at her once, questioning, then hurried as silently as possible down the ally.

"Huh...so there you are." Hasu heard this murmured not far away from the mouth of the ally and knew the monster had heard the boy's retreat. She took a deep breath and stepped into the light to face the monster

Hasu was surprised by what she saw. A dark-haired young man, maybe a few years older than the boy she had just sent away, stood before her. The young man himself seemed surprised as well.

"Oh my," he said in that same soft voice, "you're not the boy I was searching for."

Hasu remained silent, his statement barely registered in her mind. She wondered if she had made some sort of mistake. She had never seen the androids herself, or heard a clear description of them. But she couldn't mistake that voice, it was definitely the one that had called to the boy earlier. And what he had just said... As she pondered this, another figure joined them, landing neatly behind the young man as if flying were an everyday thing. This one was a young woman, appearing to be the same age as the young man. She had golden hair.

"What have you got here, 17?" the young woman asked, peering over the shoulder of the raven haired youth. "I thought you were playing with that boy?"

"I was, but he seems to have slipped by me...for the moment," replied 17. He didn't bother to glance back at his companion.

Hasu shivered at the casual way the two talked about the boy. She had made no mistake.

"Well, what should we do with her, 18?" 17 said, giving the young woman a sidelong look. "Play with her or let her go?"

18 seemed to consider this a moment, crossing her arms and staring directly at Hasu. Hasu met 18's gaze, looking into the android's eyes, and felt a cold chill. 'They're so...empty' she thought.

"She seems very quiet," 18 stated, with only the barest touch of curiosity. "I wonder if she is mute?"

"Shall we find out?" asked 17. He smiled coldly.

Before Hasu could react, 18 leapt over her android brother and elbowed Hasu in the stomach. Hasu gagged as bile rose quickly in her throat and her breath was forced out. She dropped to her knees. 18 stepped back a little, her expression not much changed.

"Hmm..." 17 bent close and grabbed a handful of Hasu's hair. He jerked her head up with it. "I thought I heard something, but I could be mistaken."

"Maybe you should try?" suggested 18, lifting an eyebrow.

Lightning quick, 17 struck Hasu across the face. Hasu cried out softly in pain, but bit back most of her reaction. 'I'm not going to give them what they want' she thought defiantly, her cheek throbbing. She glared back at 17. A small trickle of blood escaped the corner of her mouth.

"Hmph," 17 frowned, clearly not pleased. 18 made a slightly amused sound. 17 hit Hasu again, this time driving a fist into her left shoulder. Hasu's cry was louder. Agony seemed to burn a trail down her arm. She was certain she had heard a 'crack'. Cradling her arm, she ground her teeth against the pain.

17 gripped Hasu's chin hard with thumb and forefinger. "Well now, that wasn't so hard, was it?" he asked casually. Hasu just glared.

"Hmph" It was 18's turn to look displeased. She crossed her arms again. "Why don't you finish her off, 17?"

Without letting go of Hasu, 17 looked back at his sister. "Impatient, 18? I'm just having a little fun."

18's scowl deepened. "She's not even fighting back. She could at least scream, beg or cuss. This is boring."

17 gave a soft snort and turned back to Hasu. He gazed into her eyes, then smiled. "Oh, she's fighting back all right. See how she refuses to show how much pain she's in?" To emphasize his point, 17 released Hasu's chin, then grabbed her left arm and gave it a vicious twist.

Hasu couldn't stop the scream as muscle and bone separated. She nearly passed out from the pain. Her mind went blank.

18 didn't look impressed but she remained silent.

17 once again gripped Hasu's chin and forced her to look him in the eyes. "Hmmm...you know, 18 has a point. You haven't struck out once or begged for mercy. Most humans do one or the other. Why don't you?"

Hasu shivered. The cold voice penetrated the numbness of her mind, compelling her to answer. She felt like vomiting but managed to answer in a surprisingly steady voice. "I'm not a warrior. I have vowed to respect all life. I won't break that vow...even with you."

17 frowned, seemingly confused by her answer. "Foolish," he said. "You're 'respect' won't save you, if you mean it keeps you from fighting back. It also doesn't tell me why you aren't begging."

Hasu actually smiled at this, the smirk bordered on being mocking. "I know begging won't make a difference. You have no mercy, so why ask for it?"

As an answer, a hand drove into Hasu's chest and sent her flying backward. She landed hard on the ground. Nausea and vertigo washed over her, making the world dance at impossible angles. It took her a moment to realize the blow had come from 17. The boy android walked over and looked down at her.

"18 is right, you are no fun to play with." He raised a hand and faced the palm toward her. A light began to gather in it.

Hasu struggled into a sitting position, though she had no intention of trying to run. Instead, she stared into 17's eyes. The gathering energy almost blinded her, and pain shot through her head. A sense of peace began to settle over her, as well as a thought. 'He doesn't feel anything..... They can't feel...anything...' Hasu felt herself begin to smile sadly.

17 frowned at this, and lowered his hand a fraction. "What? What is it, why are you smiling? Do you want to die?"

"No," Hasu said calmly. It was true. There were many things she still wanted to do, to experience, to atone for. But wanting to live didn't mean she was going to. She had done what she had set out to this morning, that at least was something. She had that. She focused again on the android. Her shoulder and arm were blissfully numb and the vertigo had gone. "I've decided something..."

"What is that?" 17 prompted impatiently when she didn't immediately continue.

"I pity you," replied Hasu.

"What?!" 17 actually growled.

"She's insane," said 18 from behind her brother. "She's obviously not thinking clearly. Kill her and be done with it."

"You're right, 18," said 17. He laughed darkly. "Humans are the pitiful ones. So weak, so easy to cause them pain."

"At least we feel pain," Hasu said, her voice almost sad. "And not just pain...but joy, love, hate, regret...sometimes it feels like a lightning storm inside our minds. But it lets us know we are alive." Hasu noticed she didn't feel any anger or hatred now toward the androids. She found she really did pity them. "I've heard rumors that you two were human once. If you were, then you've lost a whole world. Maybe that's why you're doing this, causing pain, because you want it back...you want to feel again."

"Shut up!" shouted 17, for once not talking in that soft, cold voice. He brought his hand back up to aim at Hasu.

"I'm sorry for you," Hasu said. "You're the ones seeking death...you want to feel pain, you want to know you're alive, that's why it disappoints you when you 'play' with humans and can't find one who matches you in strength. They can't give you what you want. I hope you find another way, before you gain what you seek."

"ENOUGH!" screamed 17, his face contorted. The energy he had gathered in his hand was released. A second before it surrounded Hasu, something milky white seemed to skim along her skin, perhaps steam formed by the moisture in her body being superheated. Whatever it was, it was quickly stripped away, the fierce energy turning Hasu to ashes. But even to the end, she gazed into 17's eyes.

17 continued to blast the area for several seconds longer, until he felt a hand on his arm. The energy gradually lessened until it had stopped altogether. He lowered his arm and looked back at his android sister.

"She was wrong, 17, obviously delusional," 18 said in a firm voice. "You know how fragile human minds are."

17's angry face relaxed into a smirk. "Of course...you're right 18," he said. "She was a...disappointing...toy."

The two androids stared at each other for a moment. Then they turned in silence and leapt into the air, off to find a more satisfying diversion.


	3. Dead Blue Sea

> **By Kami's Grace**
> 
> Bonus Poem
> 
> **Dead Blue Sea**
> 
> I gaze into your eyes,  
a blue desert,  
so devoid of life.  
I wonder if you even know  
what you are missing.  
You stare at me,  
cold death lurking in ice blue,  
yet do you see me?  
Or do you see the spark of life,  
which you cannot possess?  
Do you hate me because of it?  
Or are you simply reacting,  
like darkness against light.  
I find myself crying for you,  
but you won't accept my tears.  
Even drowning in a dead blue sea,  
I'll take your name with me,  
on the lips of a prayer.


End file.
